Sikyong Debate

2016 Resolutions

In this blog entry, I will pen down my top 5 resolutions for 2016. It is in order of priority, with the number 1 my highest priority. There are many reasons to write down my goals or resolutions for  the year. It is a new start, with new vigor, energy and hope. Like in my daily life, when I have the list of things to do for the day, I tend to do and complete them more efficiently and successfully. Likewise, the significant issues that I will dedicate my time and energy on should be clearly spelled out, so that I have a clear sense of purpose and direction for the present year.

New Year Eve Party

What is the idea of celebrating the start of a new Year? Or the end of a current year?. Maybe it is a way to start anything fresh and new. In reality, the ushering of a new Year is an also a reminder that we have moved one year closer to our eventual passing away from this planet. No matter what is the reality, the convention has been to celebrate the start of each new year. Tibetan Sunday school of community members in Washington D.C is no exception in hosting a well-attended New Year Eve party.

 The New Year fundraising party in Washington D.C features cultural performance and fashion show, solo singing and speeches by Representative Kyedor la.  While the entertainment part of the celebration might not have been the greatest strength of it, the group song by Sunday school kids and fashion show added much color and richness to the party. My kids have taken part in the group song, with much excitement and enthusiasm. Thanks for Mom's care and attention, the kids always feel to be included and become a part of the whole celebration in a big way. The proper dress and other necessary care to the need for our kids would be impossible without the deft hand of my beloved wife.

 Aside from the usual fun and music entertainment, Kydor la's  speech on the responsibility of parents' in teaching spoken Tibetan to their kids at home was well meant and timely reminder. The party host is the Sunday Tibetan School, and the representative stressed on the crucial role parents plays in teaching  Tibetan to their kids at home no less than at the Sunday school. With the example of his son, who is 17 years now, he regrets the failure of teaching spoken Tibetan to him. While the young kids of those parents gathered still have plenty of time for a change and up bring.
 The irony of the Sunday school is that it helps little in teaching Tibetan language and spoken to the kids. All of the kids at school interacts in English, Tibetan is hardly used in their daily interaction. Besides, I have observed myself that parents themselves do not communicate to their kids in Tibetan even at home. Without a conducive environment for learning Tibetan at home on a regular basis, what will be the use of sending them to Sunday school ones a week?. Representative Kydor hits the nail on the head by clearly pointing to a workable strategy in bringing up kids in a Tibetan immersed culture. That is at home. Unfortunately, the Tibetan parents are lacking that wisdom of speaking to their children in Tibetan and making them speak Tibetan in reciprocity fails miserably and of course with it consequence.  What parents do to their kids at home will be manifested in their kid's behavior and personality outside.

 The party is a just a party, but the speech by the representative is worthy of contemplation and attention to solve some of our pressing problem such as bringing kids with the know-how of Tibetan language.   I chided my wife for not paying heed to Kydor la's speech and then proposed to oblige speaking in  Tibetan a part of our daily interaction at home as one of our new year resolutions.  Let see how that will play out.

 Over hundred of DC Tibetan showed up for the party, and everyone was in festive mood ready to rock. The parents of the Sunday school kids have prepared the food, and it was plentiful and delicious. After that the solo song by several ladies that received thunderous audience applause, then to my surprises, and also consternation, I was called by the Master of Ceremony to sing a song, which I had to accept reluctantly.  With my chest tightening and palms sweating I stood on the stage and belted out one of Kunga's song. It was not bad, except little glitch in my recalling of the lyrics, I have at least managed to sing the whole set of the song without showing any sign of uncertainty.  Clip of mine singing instantly went up on Wechat and shared by friends; all applauded me for having a good voice and sing well.  I have dared to venture into a new territory, that I have not explored in my life so far. That is singing the song to an audience.
 The best part of the party is the group dance to the tune of the famous Tibetan dance music, which invites many partygoers to join in the circle dance as is the case in anywhere Tibetan converge. Rather than being a mere spectator, you have to be either drinking and to chat with your mates or standing up and dance with the group. As my kids are having their own fun time, so I chose the later.   My wife looks gorgeous, and she teased me to dance with her smooth sexy movement. Everyone is having the best time of their life.

 As the countdown to new year started on the screen from a New Year live show in our party venue, champagne has been poured in what appears to be a fresh wine glass, but it turns out to be plastic wine glasses (use and throw) for all. As the clock strikes midnight, boisterous cheers erupted, and everyone with champagne in hands went around clincking for the new year and cheerfully greeted and wished one another. That was the crucial moment of the whole night.  Happy New Year!!! Greetings echoes the hallway, and people are hugging and cheering for what reasons I don't know. . 
 "Sunday School's New Year Eve party was a fun-filled party in both letter and spirit; my kids are tired and falling sleeping. When the young ones go to sleep on my lap, I take her out to leave, but ones outside the noisy hall, she walked up and requested "can I stay little bit  Daddy". Not willing to spoil her the festival mood, I  waited and waited for my little one on my lap, after until after 1:30 am and returned with the entire family to a home .Exhausted from the party, we went to sleep, and I had only three hours to lay down before getting up to go to work the next day".
 Goodbye, 2015, May the New Year 2016 bring more exciting news.

New Year Resolution and yesteryear.

As the year 2016 ushers in , everyone talks of new year resolution. I think it is a good idea to write your own new year resolution. The past is past, what is done can not be undone. What really matters is learning from the past and move in a right direction. I will write another blog to details the specific new year resolution for 2016.  But here I would like recall the major milestone of my life in year 2015. What I have not achieved in 2015 should be carried over to 2016. I will look back to 2015 by reminiscing on five major issues that affects me and those people around me. Those are family, Career, distraction, ambition, and disappointments.


1. Family:  As a married person, whether your immediate family or the extended family. Their welfare and their state of affair is a matter of concern. As for my immediate family, my wife has been extremely gracious in taking care of us with diligence and consistency unmatched by any other. My two lovely daughters had the best care possible, and they are provided the best environment for their growth at home and at school. Kunsal's summer reading class was an excellent idea, that she picked up reading fast from that summer program. My wife did her best even at time, with seriousness and stern that required to command children to do things. The kids are growing into a healthy and well rounded person. They are exposed to good environment and their play time is not shortchanged for any other things. In health wise, they get healthy food, at home and school. Even though it is still a struggle to urge them to eat healthy, they have not strayed too far away. Mom's discipline is needed to maintain order and keep them in a right path.  So they received maximum care , love and affection, at the same time, kids are told and showed that there is always a boundary that they can not cross. Overall, I am happy to see them in delightful mood, and their laughter and shout and playing is a wonderful sights.  Having said that, I should stress here that we the parents, have to be their role model, in our own behavior. They learn the most inadvertently from their parents. Therefore virtues such as patience, respect, politeness and good communication and principles are some of the things they should be acquiring from us, if we fail to be  exemplary for those.

As my extended family, my dear mom had some health issues, and fortunately she is getting better and no more relapsing. Our inability to visit them yet is a major setback. My brother Jampa Choedup's successful passing for Geshi Lamran was very joyous occasion. He is near the top and we continue to urge him to study until he is granted the title. We are hopeful for that.  Our niece Jampa Yangchen's entrance in D. Pharm was satisfying and now the ball is in her court. She has keep up her momentum. Now other major health crisis.   Owing to hosts of issues besetting Nepal, we could not take our kids to see grandpa.  But Choekyi's and kids trip to Canada was delightful and good for the kids and Choekyi.   There are many more memorable things in the 2015, but the above is what is on the tip of my tongue, and we should be cherishing. Now going to the career part.


2. Career: My career is steady and progressive. Every  year I venture in new territory and I take initiatives. If my staff  evaluation is anything, I have improved my rate besides being very consistent on my performance.  I urge myself to keep on improving, be more disciplined and aim for higher. I should be happy with my current career. There are challenges and moral issues that bother you for certain things. But overall, it is better to be playing save, that rocking the boat on issues, that do not directly affect you. But the very fact that whatever doesn't bother is the very reasons for uneasiness for me for staying quiet.  There is progress in my career, and no regress.  Let waite and see what other might come around after a month on my career related issue. So there is nothing much to share, other than that the status quo maintained. But I urge myself to be more dynamic, things need to change, it can not stay stagnant.  While career prospective looks good, I should point out that I should get rid of my distractions in life.

A Bosterious Party

After attending few get-together party at the end of the year 2015, I have a taste of fun time and merriment for a sustained period. I say it is a temporary sensory pleasure, not at all lasting joy or happiness, which we only might attain from spiritual attainment and salvation.

The first time it was the gathering of friends from Tibet, where raising your glass to ruckus of revelers and the tasting food was unforgettable. Then at our family friend Pema's house, we had yet another ball around Thanksgiving.

Staying late into the night, singing a song to toast and dancing to the tune of traditional Tibetan dance is a hit. And the most recent one was at another friend's house. Where the gathering was small and limited to parents and kids, but still we stayed late night and sing song and danced to our joy. I heard some say that without music, life is boring. While I can say, with music life is enlivened and added pleasure.

Such get -together is fun and stress relieving.  We savoured sumptuously the delicious food while the kids are playing together in separate rooms. The absence of children gives the parents time to themselves for some relief and fun from their regular stressful parenting.   My only concern is that while the parents and kids both have some good time, the loser is the kids. They do not go to bed at their usual time, because of such party. And I also don't know if leaving them all to themselves during our partying time is a good idea.

Some young boys, are little rough and playing aggressively sometimes. To the point of quarrel and conflict that is not healthy at all for young kids. The children have been left without much parental supervision, play their games and watch TV often in a small secluded room,away from the sight of their parents and elders, which might not be sensible things.

 I have clandestinely observed their movement, and most of the time, kids are engrossed in watching a movie on their tablets or TV and Other. Other times, they play video games.

On this Christmas Eve, we host a dinner for our friends at our house.  Tsering has worked out a menu, and everyone has been invited.  In total at Tenzin Kunsal's call and tally, there are over 30 people old and small. This is probably he biggest gathering in our house for years.   T  prepares and purchases things for the dinner. I have cleaned the room, and did my part for the success of the party.

This ones a while get- together is a social norm; that builds friendship, networking and rapporteur. A sense of Tibetanness is felt with all Tibetan friends coming under one roof.

Two essential things I learnt when attending  for such party is that you should, at least, be able to sing few songs. So when it comes to your turn, it will not be a bombshell.  The second thing is participating in the merriment is important in any way possible, so you will not feel out of touch. Since such gathering often disrupts the kids' regular hours or sleeping pattern, so such mass of the adult should be minimized.

As at all, another place, the Christmas Eve, party at our house is another joyful occasion.   Again late night, doing a round of sing songs and drinking into the wee hours, is a way of living for work and not working for living philosophy of life. . But I left sorry for the kids, who are left to themselves with minimum interference.

Cocktail For Overseas Chinese

The Office of Tibet, Washington D.C hosts a cocktail party for overseas Chinese. It was intended for Chinese outreaching efforts. The guests invited are predominantly Chinese intellectuals, activists and writers and journalists. Other distinguished guests include representatives of various campaign organizations and human rights activists of capitol hill. It was a  night of empowering speeches, entertainment, networking and revelry.

Kydor Auktsang in his welcome speeches stressed the office's outreach effort with the Chinese dissidents and this gala evening is the first step of much more in the offing. He outlines the nature and critical issues of Tibetan struggle, by stressing on the common ground of the Tibetan people and Chinese.  The evening is intended to bring together like-minded people and to deepen the rapport and good will amongst Tibet supporters, and it serves that purposefully.

With the departure of  Chinese liaison officer, the Office of Tibet is left with a vacuum. The Chinese outreach initiative suffered owing to this significant figure as a go-go person in strengthening and expanding people to people contact with the overseas Chinese. To a predominantly Chinese guests, the best way to communicate with them might be their mother tongue Chinese. Kydor la's  well-meaning speech on the significance of middle path and the policy of CTA is all delivered in English. Thus, the impact of it might not be felt as strongly as it would have for the Chinese only speaking if parleyed in Chinese.

Present at the meeting is another prominent Chinese dissident, Wenjing Chen, the father of Chinese democracy or Nelson Medal of China. His speech delivered in Chinese and translated into English consecutively was very critical and provocative. He stresses the importance of having a plurality of thinking and views and political ideology in exile Tibetan democracy. Such a well-represented democracy that is tolerant of other views will be a tremendous example for the Chinese democracy activists.  I believe he is among those few Chinese who indeed support Tibetan people's right to self-determination and freedom. He bashed against those who emphasizes on conformity and uniformity of approach and thinking.  The speech has a strong element of dissatisfaction at the state of affairs in regarding the Chinese and Tibetan.  Mr. Wen blasted Chinese President Xi saying that under his leadership, the rights of Chinese and Tibetan people have gone down the hill.   He busted the myth of Chinese President Xi's leniency and progressiveness and bold reform initiatives.  He made it a point that there is not telling sign of such a change shortly.  


It is a fun-filled event, with all the representatives of Tibetan communities and NGOs, and such exchange of Tibetan and Chinese should be organized more frequently.


 

Good People

 The Righteous Mind:
 Why Good People are Divided by Politics and Religion by Jonathan Haidt.

Over All Impression.

This is one book that I have read and find difficulty in understanding the themes thoroughly. When I sit down to reflect and write on my interpretation of the book's crust of the matter, all I have is a muddled up and vogue thoughts on the central points of the book. Nothing coherent and concrete to help me to clearly articulate any useful points. So be warned that what  you read here will coupound that confusion;

Anyway it seems the author is pointing out how our mind is made up. What determinates the righteous mind from the perspective of a moral psychology, and thus dwelling further by taking us on a tour of human nature and human history.  The author unequivocally stresses that moral psychology is the key to understanding politics and religion. Why people are divided by these ideas.

I feel this book would be a good supplementary teaching aid for psychology class.  As for me it takes a while to completely dissect and digest the points made /raised in the book. It requires careful reading and reflection to fully absorb the theories and principles of understanding human psychology for an average reader like me. Except that I can not unlock the intricacy of the new knowledge and research presented, the book is indeed a treasured repository of knowledge and understanding of moral psychology, but too mysterious and metaphysical and far fetched to my mind.

 The one thing that brings some clarity of thoughts is in the following analogy:

The righteous mind is like a tongue with six taste receptors:
"morality is like cuisine, it is a cultural construction, influenced by accidents of environment and history, but its not so flexible that anything goes. You cant have a cuisine based on tree bark, nor can you have one based primarily on bitter tastes.  Cuisines vary, but they all must please tongues equipped with the same five taste receptors. Moral matrices vary, but they all must please righteous minds equipped with the same six social receptors" (p. 114).

The six moral foundations based on which we cling to our idealogy are : Care/Harm, Fairness/cheating, Loyality/betrayal, Authority/subversion, Sanctity/degradation.

But  again these theories may not be the absolute truth and have different application.
"In  Physchology, theories are cheap. Anyone can invent one. Progress happens when theories are tested, supported and corrected by empirical evidence, especially when a theory proves to be useful- for example,if it helps people to understand  why half of the people in their country seem to live in a different moral universe...(p.127)